Old post: Happy + Love

I finally managed to open my Friendster account after eternity and checked my blog there (yes, I did the blog thing on Frienster, then WordPress, but I was never loyal until now). Some of my posts are actually fun – revealling a much younger and naive me. Hahaha.
Here’s one my oldest post related to love – written about a year and half into happy coupledom and I think the week we got engaged. I was so giddy it makes me laugh knowing I wrote this five years ago. Haha.
August 15th, 2005 by cristinacruz

it’s been forever since i last checked out friendster… been too busy with work. but just as i’ve told my friend carli over lunch today, i actually enjoy being busy. i love the pressure of seeing my ofc mailbox crammed full and my desktop pc barely able to keep up with all the files kept open (no wonder my pc keeps making these strange sounds like its going to explode any minute). and i actually love staying late in the office because i have so many things to do! and that is a very rare case – me loving anything that keeps me thinking ten to twelve hours straight. and i actually have this ugly kalyo on my right wrist — and you know what? i don’t care. this must be love!!! (hahaha)

speaking of love… i’m soooo happy right now. i mean, it’s almost a crime to be happy and oblivious to what’s going on in the country — but honestly, i’ve always been apathetic. Couldn’t care less as long as i’m left to mind my own business. Politics and the economy is already too messed up for me to join the fray. Besides, i know just as much as my dog, Tiger, does so it’s best that i keep myself out of where i dont belong (am i making sense or am i just rambling on???).

back to love. yes, i’m so happy. everybody deserves to be as happy as i am now. most of you probably know already why (if you don’t, then why are you even reading this???). but it feels even better to write it down and let the whole world know (hey, this account is free, i can write anything i want so bear with me).

but happiness does lead to one problem- i cant think straight, can’t write straight (err, i think having to talk to Japanese all day is largely to blame — haha!). I’ve always been more effective with words when i’m sad, near the point of depression. Now that I’m happy, there’s just nothing to write about. Or rather, too much to write about that I can’t start. And I doubt if there is any way you can ever write how happy you are. I mean, we analyze sadness, bitterness and all these feelings because we want to lessen them, we want to understand and make them go away. But with happiness, there’s just nothing to analyze there. Nothing to dissect, because you take happiness as it is. You don’t make some excuse or find a reason. You’re just happy and that’s that.

oh yes, i’m so happy. just wanted to emphasize my point.

Valentine’s Day (not)

I am not a fan of Valentine’s Day.
When I was single, my other single friends and I would get together and have a date with each other on February 14. It was a logistical nightmare as all the usual places are fully booked and managing schedules of people from different professions (accountant, IT specialist, PR, researcher, journalist, architect – we are a varied lot) makes it ell altogether. But we managed it somehow. It was our way of rebelling against the stereotypical Valentine’s Day date.
Of course, when Ipe and I became a couple, we tried the date routine too. But only once, on our first Valentine’s day together.
I still remember it was almost 8PM and I was very hungry coming straight from a twelve-hour work day.Ipe picked me up at the office with that requisite bouquet of roses. Since neither of us are very good with the reservation thing (we usually just eat where our stomachs lead us), imagine our despair when we roamed around the Glorietta and Greenbelt restaurant row and found all the nice places full.
It took as almost two hours until we finally stopped in front of Pancake House (was it in the old Greenbelt building?). Lo and behold – it was almost empty. That was when I started loving Pancake House – that single night of saving me from hunger. Haha.
And I was like? What the hell is all the fuss for one single day? Nowadays, we are bombarded by endless commercials and ads advocating Valentine’s Day. No, I’m no Scrooge. It’s just that celebrating on February 14 (or even any day in the whole month) feels so contrived and so commercialized that I often wonder if there is some conspiracy going on.

So, no. Ipe and I don’t have any special plans for Feb. 14.